Mono ieba kuchibiru samushi aki no kaze. In an English translation of this Japanese proverb: It is better to leave many things unsaid. Silence is a vital part of Japanese culture. Most Japanese feel more comfortable and at ease when there is less talk and more pauses in a colloquy. They tend to avoid eye contact and indicate attention with a mere nod. In contrast, most North Americans become unnerved with long periods of silence, and are taught to keep eye contact when speaking with others. In Obasan, Naomi is torn between the two cultures she lives in. Her aunt Obasan strictly abides with the “rules” of Japanese culture, never bringing up the past. However, Naomi’s need to speak about the past grapples with her loyalty to her family and culture, as shown on page 267: “Gentle Mother, we were lost together in our silences.”
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